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  1. And if the world ever makes you feel less beautiful, we will always be there to add some sparkle.
  2. Straight men dating men and the gay men who fall in love them | British GQ
  3. The straight men dating men and the gay men who fall in love with them
  4. Dannielle Says:

In one line, she was able to express everything about us.

And if the world ever makes you feel less beautiful, we will always be there to add some sparkle.

She might be my primary go-to girl, but there are a lot of female friends I have, all of whom I have great amazing friendships with, the kind of friendship some of their boyfriends get intimidated by. What makes these ladies connect so amazingly well with us? Why are we such a hot commodity when it comes to the kinda friends women want?

I think it's a lot to do with the fact that we are no threat to them in any way whatsoever - neither are we objectifying them, nor are we trying to get into their pretty A-line dresses. On the other hand, we are also not secretly bitching about them behind their backs with our other friends, there are absolutely no insecurities or envy involved, and we don't see them as competition.

So friendships with gay people are relatively more comfortable and quick vs a friendship with a straight man or another woman both of which can also be amazing friends BTW. When women talk to us about their problems, we listen. But more importantly we offer them insights that range from emotional to practical, and honest through and through, because we have absolutely no pressure to flatter or please her.

Straight men dating men and the gay men who fall in love them | British GQ

And when it's about their relationships, we give them perspective they require to understand the man involved, that blends amazingly with the emotional understanding and empathy we have to offer. We also understand why she hates that HR woman in the office, why her landlord is a douchebag, why her boyfriend is or is not a keeper, and why she has a difficult relationship with her father. And we understand her pain, the inequality she sometimes faces, her fears, the biases.

We know, because in some form or the other, we have faced those things too.

The straight men dating men and the gay men who fall in love with them

On a lighter note, we make for amazing soundboards when they want to talk about sex with the male species. We can talk about it way better, we can compare notes, and tell you the exact weak points of a guy's anatomy and how to drive your man crazy. We will tell them exactly why that black skirt is making them look fat, why yellow is just their color on any day, and when they need a frigging hair spa.

All of that without making her feel bad about herself. Hell, we will even let them borrow our white scarf that goes perfectly well with their blue dress. We will go ape shit crazy on your ass if you say anything less than fabulous about her, because we are fiercely protective and loyal to them girls. We are the agony aunt, the sister, the brother, the friend, the mother, the tough love, the 3 AM friend, the stylist, the TLC, sometimes the mother too, if we have to be.

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And most importantly they can be totally who they are with us. Chances are we are as crazy, if not more. We will always be there to add colors to their day. For men of an older generation, there is more distrust to surmount. LaSala, who is gay, said he could not imagine being close friends with a straight man when he was in his 20s. In the last few years, however, he has formed a warm bond with Dr. Unlocking the Power of Friendship. Garfield said. That can feel blustery and false.

Dannielle Says:

For gay men, Mr. LaSala said: At the same time, striking contrasts exist in the two worlds. Gay men say it is common for their heterosexual male friends to be jealous of, or at least compelled by, the efficiency and seeming ubiquity of man-on-man hookups.

Moments You'll Understand If You Have A Queer BFF

Toussaint said. In sex and dating, straight men also have to navigate complex power imbalances between the genders.

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Gay men can avoid that anxiety. On the other side, some gay men express jealousy over certain aspects of heterosexual male presentation. Gregory said. If such contrasts create fascination, other distinctions can be damaging. LaSala said. It portrayed Mr. Amid his milieu, he reports zero self-consciousness about having gay friends or roommates. Yet disconnects do linger, some of them concerning sex.

Kristin Says:

Whitehead said. According to Mr. He relates this to friendships between those of a different race. Sometimes there is dissonance when one friend finds himself in a group dominated by those of another orientation, rather than connecting one to one.